So many paths...

This feeling I have...kinda feels like I'm going through a mid-life crisis at the age of 21. There actually is a "quarter-life" crisis, you know, at the age of 25. I guess I got it early and I didn't even graduate from college and work in my "career" yet. That is one of the obvious reasons why I'm feeling this anxiety. I'm going to finish school pretty soon and I don't care for the program I'm graduating from. What a complete waste of four years of my life! Now I have to deal with the repayment of the student loans. Actually, they are making me pay them back now even though I'm currently attending school. The job I have at the moment isn't really helping.

This is my life at the moment, every month, like clockwork.


Even though my life seems to be at a stand still, there is still hope inside of me. Its just I don't know which way to go. I tend to come up with all these different plans on where to go or what to do next. I create so many that I lose myself all over again in the confusion. Even though I came up with a crap load of plans, there is really two choices and I have to choose one. The first choice is when I graduate, transfer to a different school, study a major that I actually want and be in debt for the rest of my life. Or the second choice is when I graduate, find a GOOD job and stick with it for a while to gain money I need to go to a university.

Choice #1: Continue to go to school
Ok, which school?

• University of Iowa
  

Why there? Well they take my credits, so it'll cost me less.

• Columbia College Chicago
  

I truly think that this is the school for me. But I read some reviews on the school and they were not good. And it's really expensive. Not sure if financial aid/student loans would help cover the costs.

• "Specialty" School in New York

They are cheaper than CC-Chicago but it's in NY. The living expenses are way too expensive and I'll end up living in Central Park.

or
Choice #2: Get a career, earn money, then go back
Ok, where to apply?

• Cruise Ship

Would be a good idea to do but I have to have at least a year experience working in a restaurant. I don't think that fast food counts.  But I can always do something else.

• Hotel

Seem like a logical choice

• Casino

A more interesting place to work instead of a hotel

• Restaurant

......*sigh*

I still have some time to think about what to do next. Actually, I know what I want to do but I can't do it because of my financial situation. Just have to figure out if its possible to get there.
Life is just a bunch of roads, don't know where it's going to take you.