Tuesday, September 8, 2009

This was not supposed to happen

Nothing can be done to prevent it from happening since my heart is not made of stone. Though at times, I wish it was. I try to build walls, and I do but it seems pretty pointless since they are easily broken. Haha, I'm the one that breaks them down for that one person to come through. So I can be vulnerable and endure the pain that comes my way.

"You hope it don't get harmed
But even if it does
You'll just do it all again"
-Regina Spektor

(Because secretly, we're all masochists.)

What a way to blow that cute phrase, huh? Haha, I'm joking. But it is truly hard to act like your heart was never broken. It's kinda like that whole "learning not to touch the stove" situation for me. I got hurt. Several times with different guys. Ok, what to do to prevent it from happening again? The answer is nothing. There is nothing that anyone can do except to build walls and even those fall.

Now...to tell or not to tell. I'm afraid to tell my crush how I feel. It's kinda insane to think that it's scary to tell someone:

Simple little words with so much meaning.


otin said...

Most guys are flattered that a woman has a crush on them! I don't think that you should feel funny about telling him.

Randomization said...

It's that fear of rejection that's stopping me. I'm still debating, lol.

Stephanie Faris said...

Eventually you HAVE to tell. You just have to...or you'll always wonder "what if."

A therapist once said that the key to opening your heart is to recognize what fears are based in "emotional triggers" from past events and what fears are truly there to keep you out of trouble. Fear is a wonderful thing...it's there to protect you. But sometimes it can go awry and the key is to recognize YOU are in charge here. If you can take control of your thoughts and recognize when something is coming from past experiences and NOT let it come into play this time, you can conquer it.

At the end of your life, it's not the number of times you've been hurt that you'll remember. It's the number of times you loved freely, with all your heart.

Randomization said...

Yeah, you're right. Don't really want to go into that "What if?" phase.

Just have to figure out when the timing is right to say it.

Karilynnlove said...

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Check it out!

Lisa Nilsson " Sudrosa" said...

Using my art i see i dont mind it but atlest name me or refere to my pages!

/ sudrosa The photografer

Lisa Nilsson " Sudrosa" said...

i see im linked now, thats nice, thank you <3